LAS VEGAS -- The son of a woman bilked out of $90,000 has advice for other grown children concerned about their aging parents: Get involved sooner rather than later.

At his mother's house in Oregon, John Fread noticed a credit card statement with a balance of $20,000. Scammers had charged almost five times that much on several accounts. They started as phone solicitors and eventually sent people to her home to lift financial information. Fread says the ordeal took a terrible toll - not only on his mother's finances, but on her health.

"We are having to really offer emotional support that we never expected. My mom - you know, tough old girl - is now very vulnerable, and her confidence is gone. These people really robbed what should have been the last great part of her life. They took that away from her."

Fread advises grown children to get to know their parents' neighbors, and check out any new people with whom they seem to be friendly. Look at their incoming mail and caller ID for hints of scams and solicitations. Don't worry about seeming nosy, he says; he wishes he had been.

The Nevada secretary of state's office says financial exploitation is the most common form of elder abuse, costing victims $2.9 billion a year.

Fread says collection agencies still are hounding them about the credit card debt, even though they've been informed of the scam. He hopes other families can avoid the ordeal by having conversations that may be uncomfortable - but necessary.

"You know, 'Mom, Dad, things are a little different in your generation than my generation. Here are some things that we need to talk about because I've seen it happening. It's in the news,' for example. It's so much easier to sit down and have the tough conversation proactively, than try to scramble and reactively try to fix something."

A report by MetLife Insurance Co. says financial abuse of older people is up 12 percent in the past five years. Last month, a Las Vegas woman got a one-year jail sentence for financial exploitation, and has to repay $68,000 to a former resident of a group home she owned.

Fraud information from AARP is online at aarp.org. The MetLife research is at metlife.com.